An hour ago Sam fell fast
asleep in the passenger seat of the Impala. Dean could hear his
brother's
breathing, even over the Led Zepplin tape that was playing softly
throughcar's
stereo speakers. There was a lot of road in front of them as they
headed to
Dean rolled his
shoulders. He was on his fourth hour of driving, and relished the fact
that he
would drive another two. There were days that he didn't want to
relinquish
control of driver's seat, and this was one of those days. He smiled,
luxuriating in the open road of possibilities before him, and the
responsiveness of a V-8 engine. Momentslike this seemed to be so
passive, but
actually involved action with a slight adjustment to the gas pedal or
the
steering wheel.
His phone began buzzing.
When Sam had fallen asleep, he had placed the phone on vibe so that no
incoming
calls would disturb his younger brother's rest. Exhaustion was his
brother's
companion, and sometimes there was need for a trial separation. Sam
would just
crash, usually in the Impala where he was lulled like a child by the
hum of the
engine.
He glanced at the caller
id, but did not recognize the number. There was familiarity in the area
code—the state of
"Hello," He
gave a quiet greeting, keeping his voice low. He glanced at Sam who had
not
stirred at the disruption.
He listened to the
feminine voice, trying to remember the last person he had hooked up
with for a
night of release. "Yes, that's me. How can I help you?"
He gripped the phone
against his ear, frozen in moment. He didn't understand what the person
was
saying. "I'm sorry. I didn't catch that."
It was funny how the mind
sometimes did not want to comprehend the unexpected. It was probably a
protection mechanism. He heard himself asking the question, "When?"
and then a moment later, "How?"
He swallowed at the
replies, staring straight ahead. "Okay, thanks."
He blinked, remembering
he was driving a car, but thankfully the car in front of him was still
at a
distance. During the conversation, his foot slipped slightly off the
gas. Dean
closed the phone, and then opened it, shutting it off. Closing it again
he
slipped it into his jacket pocket. His eyes filled up with the emotion
that
wanted to escape. He gave a soft cough, and then wiped his eyes. With
two hands
he gripped the steering wheel. He glanced in the rear view mirror,
looking away
when he did not like what he saw. He had to keep it together. He had to
stay in
control.
A small highway sign on
the right hand side of the road stated that a rest area was up ahead.
Dean
pushed the signal lever up decided he needed to stop for a moment. The
rest
area had a gas station, Burger King and an Arbys giving travelers a
choice in
their caloric intake. Dean pulled the Impala over, parking it near a
white
Toyota Echo. He liked the contrast-black and white, big and small. It
was the
little thoughts that kept the horrors at bay.
He shut the car engine
off, and pocketed the keys. He had forgotten that Sam was sleeping
soundly as
he shut the car door, letting it slip before he could quietly close it
with a
click.
"Hey?" His
brother said groggily, stretching as he woke up, but not fully alert.
Dean opened the door
again to speak to Sam. He didn't look at his brother; instead he
focused on the
family entering the fast food restaurant, taking them in as though they
were
the latest threat. "Yeah, I just need to take a leak."
"Okay," Sam
sighed, rubbing his hair before curling up again.
"Go back to
sleep." Dean said with a hush tone. This time he closed the door
quietly.
There was a bank of
bathrooms by the Burger King, for which he was grateful. He didn't want
to have
to walk into either of the restaurants, and then feel obligated that
since he
had used their bathroom he should make a purchase. The white doors on
the blue
painted cinder block structures were not inviting, but they allowed
privacy.
Dean closed the door behind him, careful to lock it before he slid down
the
door, coming to rest on the tile floor. He wrapped his hands over his
head, so
his elbows covered his eyes, and hunched his back. Tears rolled down
his face
as he hit the back of the door with his head.
He took a few deep
breaths, willing himself to calm down. He couldn't stay in the bathroom
too
long, before Sam would become concerned. He removed his phone from his
pocket
again and turned it on. Scrolling deftly through the few numbers he
highlighted
'Cassie.' He put the phone to his forehead, letting it rest there for a
minute.
Cassie was dead.
Her friend had called,
having found his phone number listed in her Palm Pilot. Cassie had
moved to a
new town as working at another newspaper. Dean had known that part.
Cassie had
been excited at the challenge.
She had just purchased a
condo. And then Dean could visualize the rest-her death.
The demon, his yellow
eyes glowing menacingly, had stood over her. He would have liked to
think that
she was sleeping, but more than likely he had stalked her in her own
home,
cornering her and then pinned her to the ceiling. Her blood dripped as
she screamed
for help. But, Dean wasn't there to save her. She had burned, like his
mother,
like Jessica.
Cassie's friend had told
him the official story: There had been a fire; faulty wiring to blame
and she
had died.
Dean looked at the phone
again. He had been in the bathroom for five minutes. It was funny how
time
passed so slowly, yet moments stayed ingrained in your mind for a
lifetime.
Dean stood up, and walked over to the mirror. Tears streaked his face.
His eyes
were red. He also saw the truth.
It had been the demon
exacting revenge on Dean. Two wrongs don't make a right, the demon has
said
before attacking him. The Demon was getting even. Dean turned on the
cold water
and splashed his face. The water burned against his eyes, or that may
have been
the tears trying to permeate his being once more. He grabbed a fistful
of the
coarse paper towels and patted his face dry.
Again he looked at the
pocked mirror, checking to see for evidence. To his eyes he looked
hollow, but
no one else would see it. Sam wouldn't see it, which was the way it
needed to
be.
He patted his other
pocket, remembering he had sunglasses in there. He unlocked the door,
went out
the glare of the rest stop, making his way with determined steps back
to the
Impala while putting on his dark sunglasses for protection. Sam was
resting
again, head pressed against the glass. He opened his eyes a crack at
the creak
of the car door, and gave a nod.
Dean nodded, and started
the engine, backing out to get them back on the highway. He kept the
silence,
and Sam fell asleep once more leaving Dean to his own remunerations.
Hours passed as he
relived his moments with Cassie. First the two weeks he had spent with
her in
Then there was the phone
call that changed his life once more, and he embraced it. A few more
days
together, and he questioned his choices. Sure, they would fight until
they were
eighty, but there was something powerful between them. Now, Cassie
wouldn't
live to see twenty-six. Had he cursed her, believing she would live to
a ripe
old age by his side? His guilty thoughts were interrupted by his
brother.
"When did we make it
into
Dean had taken notice
intermittently of his surroundings, even though he was lost in his own
emotional world. "About an hour and half ago."
Dean felt his brother's
staring at him. "Geez, Dean, why didn't you wake me? You've been
driving
for over six hours."
"Time goes by when
you are having fun." The older
"We close to
Dumas?" Sam looked around, attempting to get some bearings. The
"It's the next town
over." Dean cleared his throat. His internal monologue had left his
throat
dry and constricted. He had a role that he had to play-big brother not
mourner.
Sam did not notice
anything amiss with Dean. The younger brother rolled his shoulders. "Do
you want to go to the school now or tomorrow?"
Dean felt he was barely
keeping it together. He couldn't focus on a hunt at this moment.
"Tomorrow, no rush since school is out for the summer." He had to
think about pretenses, what would he have done if he hadn't gotten the
phone
call of Cassie's death? He had to think back when things were simple
direct
versus indirect. "We can get something to eat, find a place and play
some
pool."
"Fine," Sam
sighed, and Dean heard the frustration in the tone.
"What? Can't wait to
smell the pencils and paper? " The older
"No, it's just that
web board. . ." Sam stretched his arms, until his shoulders popped. He
relayed
the story that had gotten their attention. "A popular girl dies when no
one picks up her after volleyball practice. The police have no idea who
did it.
Then suddenly there is all this strange stuff happening." The Dumas
High
School web board was filled with pages of comments from classmates who
were
sharing their experiences with the supernatural. "Kids are getting
hurt.
It seems urgent."
"Sam, they're high
schoolers. It's all about the drama with them. Don't you watch One Tree
Hill?" The incidents ranged from the innocuous with people being locked
in
rooms and furniture moving around unassisted to physical attacks. Three
boys
had been pummeled by gym equipment when they went into the supply
closet. Some
lockers closed unexpectantly while students were still getting out
books had
left many a bruised hand.
Sam raised his eyebrows.
"I don't think that One Tree Hill has had an episode where the
bathrooms
on the first floor filled with blood."
Dean's reply was silent,
as he looked at the road ahead. That had been the catalyst that had
them on the
road from Tennessee. The principal had quickly reassured the students
that the
incident was normal-the city was cleaning out the water pipes. But, a
quick
look at records showed the Winchester brothers that the water
department was
not cleaning on that day.
"It's the summer-no
kids in school. It can wait a day." Dean knew it was completely
unnatural
for him not to want to rush in, but he wanted to be more cautious or
maybe it
was the feelings of sadness on the periphery that made him feel deeply
calm.
"Plus, it isn't like we don't know what we are getting into—those kids
already did our research for us. Everything started with the girl's
death."
Sam nodded in agreement
although knowing his brother there would be some research involved. "I
wonder if they would have noticed if Christy Kenney wasn't one of the
most
popular girls at school."
Dean smiled. The grin did
not reach his eyes, and didn't echo inside of him, but Sam's high
school angst
was a laughable issue. "Dude, get over it."
"What?" Sam
stated, looking at his brother in puzzlement.
Dean shook his head. He
remembered his brother's complaining the entire last four years of his
public
school education. It was part of his brother's modus operandi-he had
wanted to
fit in, and be normal-part of his grand plan. "You weren't popular in
high
school." Dean reminded his younger brother. "It's over-not everyone
can reach those upper echelons of high school."
"Upper
echelons?" Sam snorted. He gestured to the tape hanging out of the
Impala's stereo. "You didn't even rank."
"I was cool-I didn't
need to be popular." Dean replied, wanting to quickly dismiss this
conversation. It was all so unimportant. At that moment he wanted to
drop the
façade. He wanted to tell his brother that Cassie was dead. But,
that would
lead to a pity party, and Dean didn't want pity. He didn't want his
brother to
say the famous cliché, 'Better to have loved and lost than never
loved at all.'
And he didn't want the camaraderie of death with his brother. Dean
gripped the
steering wheel tighter. Sometimes he needed to get through things not
day by
day but, moment by moment.
"Riigghht, whatever
you need to tell yourself." Sam commented, and Dean found it
appropriate
in light of his thoughts. "You know, maybe Christy Kenney was a
coincidence- a red herring." Sam rubbed a hand over hid mouth in
thought.
"Maybe, I mean that
school was asking for trouble." Dean recalled the Dumas high school web
page.
"Their athletic teams are called the Demons and Demonettes. Talk about
playing for the wrong team. . ."
Sam laughed. "They
were conference champs-guess it's not hurting them."
"Deals with the
devil. . ." Dean let his words trail off finding that topic completely
inappropriate. They had entered Dumas city limits and the metallic
Super Motel
sign loomed ahead.
Dean flicked the signal
up, and turned right into the parking lot. Two cars were in the parking
lot.
Summer season in Dumas didn't invite tourist. Dean parked the car near
the door
of the furthest room. He shut the car off, and walked to the
registration
area-the heat from the pavement coming through his shoes with each step.
The bell above the door
jingled, announcing his entry to the bored clerk watching television.
Dean
checked in without issue and minimal conversation. As he walked back to
the
Impala, he noticed Sam outside by the trunk removing their bags.
Dean accepted his duffle,
and tossed the memento the clerk had given him to his brother. "Here,
don't say I don't think of you."
Sam fumbled for a moment,
but caught the item. "What is this?"
Dean smirked at the
caricature of the cowboy illustrated on the pin. "A pin they give to
all
the losers-I mean travelers who come here."
"I'm a Ding Dong Daddy
from Dumas?" Sam replied, studying the inscription. He tossed it back
at
his older brother.
"Some guy wrote this
song, inspired by this town . . . and the rest is history." Dean threw
the
pin away in the trash. They walked to the door of the room. Dean opened
the
door. "The clerk said here was a bar down the road with the best
barbecue."
Sam paused for a moment,
gauging his hunger level. "I could eat."
After a quick shower to
remove the sediment of the drive they headed to Sal's Barbeque. The bar
was no
different than any of the other dives they went to, greeting patrons
with its
dark wood accented by glass and mirrors. Two flat screen televisions
adorned
each corner-one with triple A baseball and the other with National
League game.
Three pool tables to the left attracted a small crowd. Pub tables were
set up
in front of the bar, for additional seating. Dean and Sam occupied a
table.
Dean tried to ignore the
stench of smoke and the sweet smell of barbeque, which he usually found
invigorating. Normally, he would asses the crowd-the women mainly, pick
one out
and hone in. Everyone looked ugly to him. He let Sam order-two beers
and two
full slabs of ribs.
Dean smiled at the
waitress as an acknowledgement, nothing more. Dean let Sam ramble,
lulled by
his brother's narrow mumblings about the present job. The ribs and the
beer
came quickly, with a set of wet wipes on the side.
Sam, after having slept
for most of the car ride decided he was ravenous and inhaled his order.
The
French fries were attacked next.
"Next time Sammy,
order the whole cow." Dean had eaten half of the slab, instead finding
the
beer more refreshing.
Sam eyed his brother's
remnants. "If you're not going to finish yours off…."
"Here," Dean
pushed the basket to his brother. He looked back to the pool tables.
They
needed some money, and Dean craved being productive. He signaled to his
brother
that he was heading to the pool tables. Dean scanned the few patrons,
finally
finding his mark-An older biker with red scraggly hair, a pool stick in
one hand
and his woman in the other. She was a bleached blonde, pretending she
was in
her twenties with a too short skirt, when she was over forty.
Dean pulled out a twenty
from his wallet, folded it and placed it between two fingers in his
right hand.
"You interested?" He asked interrupting the couple.
The older man was shaking
his head, happy to be with his lady friend. She however prompted him.
"Come on, honey, for
me?" She cooed, pursing her lips, making the bright pink blush on her
cheeks stand out more.
"Just for you,"
he pulled her in tighter. "Rack 'em up."
Dean knew he was better,
but let the game continue at an amiable rate. The girl, Cheryl, kept
cheering
on her boyfriend, Roy, who Dean discovered was wearing Outlaw colors on
the
back of his denim vest. Had Dean saw the skull and cross bones insignia
he
would have picked someone else to play.
Dean won the first game,
and would have walked away, but it was double or nothing and he was
tired of
the smug, happy couple. He wanted them to lose. The hunter let the
biker break
out of courtesy, but that was Dean's last friendly gesture.
At some point, Dean got
into his face-toe to toe with a man with the skull and cross bones
patch on his
vest. Incredibly stupid, but he didn't care. Sam must have been
watching from
his perch at the bar, because he wandered over when he saw his
brother's
confrontation. He pulled his brother back, trying to decrease the
tension of
the situation. "Dean what is up with you?" Sam smiled at the victim
giving him a nod.
"What?" Dean
replied, jutting out his chin. "He thinks I'm cheating!"
Sam shook his head out of
disbelief and courtesy to the large man that his brother had insulted.
"Can you read minds or something?"
"Or something,"
Dean walked around his brother, and gestured to the other player.
"Forget
it. Take another shot if it makes you feel better. Five minutes more
won't make
a difference." Dean taunted.
"Kid, back
off." The red headed man turned his neck and looked at his patch as a
warning to Dean. "This is a friendly game of pool-that's all."
Sam laughed nervously,
and stayed close to his brother, ready to fight by his side. "Yeah,
friendly, Dean can do friendly." Sam glared at his brother. Dean
ignored
him. He didn't want Sam making excuses for him, after they had thrown
their
happiness in his face.
Dean had been correct.
Five minutes was all that was needed to win the game. The larger man
handed
Dean a fifty dollar bill, folded, and placed it in Dean's shirt pocket.
He
patted the pocket. "You're lucky, kid. Very lucky, that she's here."
Dean was about to make a derogatory comment, but glanced at Cheryl. He
was
reminded about the power of women-how their touchcould bewas
empowering, loving
and calming.
Sam pulled his brother
away, pushing him out the exit. Dean let himself be pushed, and guided.
"Wow, you were a
real ass." Sam walked over to the driver's side. He held up his hand
for
Dean to throw him the keys.
"Whatever,"
Dean accepted his punishment, and tossed his brother the car keys. He
could
turn off and on his emotions, but some were seeping out in his need to
be
violent. He wanted a fight, but knew he couldn't draw attention to
himself, or
Sam.
The younger hunter
continued his diatribe. "We're spending the next few days here and you
go
riling up the locals, a one percenter—not cool."
"You done? 'Cause
I'm tired." Dean closed his eyes, and relaxed against the leather
passenger seat of the Impala. The drive was only a few minutes, but it
allowed
him to gather his thoughts.
The hotel initially
appeared dingy, suddenly was pristine after leaving the bar. Dean took
another
shower, avoiding any further discussion with his brother who was
researching on
his laptop, plugged into the phone outlet in order to gain internet
access.
Dean flopped on the bed, and turned the television on. He waited for
Sam to
fall asleep, feigning sleep for hours. Dean wished that Sam had not
slept the
hours away in the car. Hours passed before Sam emitted a yawn and
decided to
call it a night, or an early morning as the case may be. Dean waited,
patiently
for the soft even breathing that signaled REM sleep. Quietly, he
removed the
sheet that covered him, pausing so that the motel's mattress squeak
would not
give away his intentions. Satisfied, he went to the desk and opened the
laptop.
He checked to make sure the volume was off.
The laptop powered up,
and he googled Cassie's name. He needed to look up Cassie's obituary
and the
fire. He needed knowledge about her last moments. He knew reading he
reports of
the fire would not change his mind. It was macabre to dwell on her
death-to
feel a sense of caustic obsession imagining her last moments. But, Dean
had to
ingrain it all in his memory. There was a fine line between being
swallowed by
despair and being fed by it to continue forward.
For three days the local
newspaper reported on the fire. The first day it was front page news.
The
second day it was pushed to page four. The third day the world news had
forced
the reports of the fire and the single death to the fifteenth page.
Then there
was nothingness.
The obituary was placed
before the classifieds-disrespectful of the dead. The dead could not
complain
and the living that remained were burdened by their grief. Cassie's
obituary
was one column long stretching to the end of the page. The first
statement
stated that only her mother remained- a family yet again affected by
the
supernatural. Then Dean was introduced to the Cassie he never knew. The
girl
who was captain of her high school field hockey team, recipient of a
National
Merit Scholarship, and journalist for her college paper. Instead of
sharing the
past experiences with him, he was reading about the Cassie he didn't
get a
chance to know.
Dean glanced back to
check his younger brother. Sam was still sleeping soundly.
Her picture was above the
obituary. Dean copied the photo onto to the laptop's desktop. He looked
up the
local Walgreen's website, and sent the photo to be picked up by him in
the
morning. He cleared the cache and the history of the web browser. He
placed the
photo in the recycle bin, and then emptied the trash. He didn't want
Sam
inadvertently discovering Cassie's death. Hesitantly, he closed the web
browser, and felt the aching of the finality of it all. He stared at
the
computer, and hit 'Shutdown.' Then he slumped, exhaustion filling him.
A black
and white, four by six photo would be the only evidence that Cassie had
been a
part of Dean's universe.
Dean pushed himself up,
and crept back into bed. The rough sheet grated against his skin. It
was still
dark out, and things always looked darkest before the dawn. Sadly,
though Dean
knew that the daylight would not change the fact that Cassie was gone.
Notes:
Dumas is a real town in Texas where there was a death of a high school
student.
And, I found out afterwards that the teams are really called Demons and
Demonettes. The Outlaws are a motorcycle gang and 1 refers to the
percentage of
those who own motorcycles who are in a , Walgreens does offer that
photo
service I describe.
Uploaded by Etta
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